Eloquent moron says more stupid stuff beautifully

I used to like Alec Baldwin. He was a wonderful stage actor. But then he went and got political, and ever since then it's been a long, slow death-spiral into raving moonbatism.

His latest effort comes care of the HuffPost. In it, he tries to out-manic his liberal pals, by declaring that Vice President Cheney is a terrorist:
Will They Go to Court?

So, I suppose the question is...what kind of civil trial will we see, or not see, between Cheney and Whittington? Whittington is certainly no stranger to a court room and to civil litigation. Will Cheney pay him off, preemptively? Will they go to court? I would imagine if a guy with a few beers in him shoots you in the face on a hunting trip, how could you turn down that opportunity?

What would Cheney do about the whole secrecy thing then? I mean, this is the guy that sicced Enron on Gray Davis and the state of California to embarrass Davis, trigger the recall and then watched Arnold Schwarzenegger become governor of California. (To this day, perhaps, still the low point in American political life.) Then Cheney covered it up.

[...]

Cheney is a terrorist. He terrorizes our enemies abroad and innocent citizens here at home indiscriminately. Who ever thought Harry Whittington would be the answer to America's prayers. Finally, someone who might get that lying, thieving Cheney into a courtroom to answer some direct questions.
It's wonderful hysteria, totally without merit. It's one long exercise in poetic ad hominem venom. Yet it ultimately says nothing.

Except that ole Alec is a bit of a hypocrite. He's a public figure like Cheney. He even took a few abortive stabs at democratic politics. Yet, when he was accused of wife beating by former spouse Kim Basinger, he did everything he could to keep the unsavoury episode out of the courts and on the QT:
Alec, Kim, get down and dirty

THE divorce between Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger is about to get ugly.
To avoid huge legal fees - and blaring headlines that might embarrass their daughter, Ireland, 8 - the couple had been working with an arbitrator.

"He was trying to protect his daughter," said a friend of Baldwin. "But once the arbitrator started ruling against Kim, she found a loophole and had him fired. So now they are facing a very public trial next year."

Baldwin got the bad news on Thursday, around the time he learned he'd been nominated for a Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actor for his portrayal of a cynical Vegas casino owner in "The Cooler."

Basinger's case will be built on her contention that her hot-tempered husband was "emotionally and physically abusive."

After the National Enquirer ran a story that Baldwin had beaten his estranged wife in April 2002, his brother Billy branded Basinger "a black widow spider" and a "a nutcase," and told the tab:

"Is my brother a saint? No. Is he volatile? Yes. But he is not a wife-beater. I think what may have happened is that Kim may have taken a run at Alec during a fight, and he may have put his arm up to protect himself or push her off. But that's not beating your wife." [Hahahahahaha!!!!! - Ed]

In a statement to PAGE SIX, Basinger's publicist said: "An independent evaluator in the child custody case of Kim Basinger and Alec Baldwin's daughter, Ireland, has recommended primary physical custody to Ms. Basinger and visitation rights to Mr. Baldwin.

"The report exonerates Ms. Basinger of all false allegations made by Mr. Baldwin and acknowledges that Ms. Basinger lived in an emotionally and physically abusive marriage for 10 years. Ms. Basinger has accepted this report.
"She ran straight into my clenched and extended fist, your honour!"

Sure thing, Slugger. We'll take your word for it.

Just don't start slamming others for wanting to minimize their embarrassment over something that legitimately was an accident.


Cross-posted from FOJ

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